WARNING: I will be making very awful jokes in bad taste in this entry. If you are easily offended do not read this. It concerns dead babies. This entry will also be extremely graphic & just plane gross. You've been warned...
I just pulled out the biggest crustiest blood clot from my left nostril... Seriously it looks like I had a nose abortion. I could donate it to stem cell research. I feel like I should have a funeral for it. I have to irrigate my sinuses several times a day & blow gently to clean them out. Yesterday I got a little blow happy & it felt like something was poking out of my sinus. I thought it was the split that is holding my septum up, so I have been pushing it back in carefully periodically. It was hurting me really badly, so I grabbed a tissue, hunkered down in my cubicle & started to dig. I started to pull on it & after a couple of screams I pulled it out. It wasn't the splint. I am sad that my pal here at work, Evil Betty, isn't here because I would have showed him it. I am also glad I don't have a camera phone because I would have taken a picture & posted it. I really would have. I just feel like I have to show someone because I am absolutely astonished by the size of the thing. I actually feel empty.
Big kid update
3 years ago
3 comments:
Personally, I think it's a woman's choice if she wants to pick bloody shit out of her nose. But, then again, I'm pretty liberal. Also, if you don't mind, I want to hear some of the stories that you've heard from Crazy B. I've always wanted to understand more about the motivations and ations of crazy people.
I'm pro-life, but that was the funniest thing I've ever read. It felt good though, didn't it? Like a massive dump that's so clean you don't even have to wipe.
Did you ever have a corpuscle filled snot clog stuck between your nose and your throat? And did you ever spit it into the sink and think that it might have been a frog?
I just wasn't ready for the responciblity of taking care of a a clot. I am too young to take care of one & after carrying it around for 9 months, I couldn't give it up to anyone else. I don't regret my decision, but I do regret the stituation. I will always love little Clotty Jr & he will live in my heart forever...
As for some tales of Crazy B, I will have to devote a whole blog to his antics one day. The jist of his tales usually comes down to poor impulse control. Especially when it comes to women & stressful situations. Lets just say he's been arrested a few times for stalking & has been fired for being violent from all his jobs. He sounds dangerous, but deep down inside he's just a lost boy. His dad is a rich bastard who abused him & his family mentally. I just want to hug him...
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